After much preparation, the young self-proclaimed Emperor of The Han Dynastory is now serving a full-time mission to the UK with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

He will return in 2014.


Welcome to the Han Dynastory!

As I am now serving a full-time mission with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I have left this blog under the stewardship of a family member, who may post updates on how I'm doing as he/she sees fit.

Enjoy your stay!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Taking A Break

I'm sitting at the coffee table in my uncle's living room in Kuantan, listening to Erik Satie's Gymnopedie No. 1 on YouTube. I had 12 hours of sleep last night and I just had a nap earlier. I did a simple pencil portrait of my uncle over lunch and I had some fun doing a few pen sketches of roses on the couch later.

I guess one could reasonably conclude that I am taking a break. Well, in the physical sense that would be very much true, judging by the amount of sleeping involved. However, I think I am yet to discipline my mind to the point that I can take mental breaks. When I'm not careful my mind wanders off to thinking about the work I need to complete when I get back to Singapore (if I'm not busy trying to ignore the fact that it's Valentine's Day today, of course), and how soon I would like to get back to Singapore to get it all done. I don't know when I mutated into a workaholic, but it's taking a toll on my sanity.

Somehow, my misguided sense of responsibility leads me to take charge of things, and I find it difficult to let other people handle things I was previously in charge of. People have told me that I need trust other people more, but I think that is not the main issue. The problem lies in my inability to accept imperfection in what I do. I can accept imperfection in what others do, knowing that I will never truly understand the capability of others. However, I, for some reason, believe that I should be able to meet certain standards I set for myself, and when I fail to meet them, I feel like I've let myself down. Hence, the difficulty I have in letting go of things and handing tasks over to others lies in the self-inflicted guilt that I haven't done enough. It is something I will likely be spending a huge part of my life overcoming. As my teacher advised during a very candid and emotional sharing session, I cannot afford to keep voluntarily offering myself as a martyr.

This is completely unrelated, but I learnt something interesting while on the road with the family yesterday. We were driving from Singapore to Kuantan, and my Dad (who had to drive from KL to Singapore to pick us up) was tired. I offered to take over as driver while we were along the coastal highway (on the East coast of Peninsular Malaysia). Mind you, it was my first time driving along that highway, a highway with only one lane on each side, meaning that each time I attempted to overtake a vehicle in front of me, I would have to watch out for vehicles approaching from the opposite direction. My first few attempts at overtaking were carried out very cautiously. I observed the timing of other drivers ahead and how far they cut into the opposite lane. When it finally came down to it, I remember hardly anything besides slamming the accelerator as if my life depended on it. Of course, after a while the slamming of the accelerator was done less out of fear but more out of frustration with slow drivers (we were late for our reunion dinner and these jokers were crawling at 60km/h). One particularly amusing driver happily drove in the middle of two lanes unless there were cars coming from the opposite direction, causing me to spend a good 15 minutes just trying to overtake him. Where are the "jump" or "launch missile" buttons when you need them -.-

Okay, erm, back to what I learnt that I found interesting... At some point I found myself driving behind a bunch of cars who were in turn driving behind a huge truck. One by one they overtook the truck until it was my turn. Then I noticed something which Mom pointed out. People overtook the truck when the truck had its left signal on. Nobody overtook the truck when it had its right signal on. Basically, the truck driver was kindly signaling when it was safe for the drivers behind to overtake (since the sheer size of the truck made it difficult for drivers behind to see what was ahead). I have to admit that I had not expected that sort of kindness to come from my fellow countrymen on the road. Nevertheless, I was all the more pleased. Little instances of kindness like that make people's days. That's a thought I should remember as I go about each day =)

Sunday, February 07, 2010


A lot can happen in 90 minutes of a heart to heart talk.

Like forgetting that your next lesson is at 3:10 and not 3:30!